I’ve got a lot more posts I want to make.  I have a half-written post about why insurance companies are leaving California.  I have ideas about whether the Federal Reserve should target 2% or 3% as the inflation rate.  And I even have more thoughts about Dominions 6, which I’m sure everyone is excited to read.  But I haven’t been writing.

I don’t know why, but I often have trouble in the springtime.  For whatever reason, my mood often becomes languid, I no longer want to work on things, and I start avoiding social contact even when it makes me happier to socialize.  I sometimes sit for hours just watching videos or reading on my phone when I should be working or would rather be socializing, because I’m scared of facing the real world.

I don’t know why I do this, and I’m trying to stop.  I’ve done more work to make concrete plans on what I need to get done at work so that I can actually get to doing it instead of avoiding it.  And I’ve tried to push myself to actually call or text people when I want to make plans with them, rather than avoiding that because I feel bad that I haven’t spoken to them in a while.

That in and of itself is a difficult hole to dig out of.  I feel depressed, so I don’t talk to my friends.  Then when I want to talk to them, I feel bad that I haven’t talked to them in a while, so I avoid doing so out of embarrassment.  I need to stop doing that, because it doesn’t get me anywhere.

I don’t know, this post is rambly.  But this is the streams of my consciousness.  I hope I can get those other posts about finance and video games written.  And I hope the summer brings me more peace of mind than what I’ve had so far this year.